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How to End a Long Term Relationship: 7 Working Tips to Know

How to End a Long Term Relationship

It seems that your love story will last forever and nothing can change your feelings. Then, you see how another happy couple broke and you are wondering why. They seem to be so much in love with each other, they have been dating for years and had common goals. Then, one day you understand that you also want to end a long term commitment and start a new page of life. You know, what? There are no guarantees that the knowledge of how to end a long term relationship will not be necessary to you. After all, life is unpredictable and the best thing that you can do is to be happy.  Do you want to know how to end a long-term relationship? Keep reading. 

How to Know When to End a Long Term Relationship?

Let’s face the truth, people who have been together for many years, do not make an impulsive decision to separate. Usually, it is a well-thought decision that they are sure about. The reason is that partners realize how difficult it is, and evaluate the situation properly before sharing their desire. The reason can be different, in fact. Among the most widespread ones are abuse, various points of view on definite issues,  losing trust, cheating, etc. 

In case, you postpone this decision for a long time, and now you want to be sure that it is correct, then look when you should do it:

  • You do not feel happy anymore
  • Your partner doesn’t contribute into your relationship
  • You can’t arrange proper communication with your partner
  • There is neither trust nor respect in your relationship
  • You are dealing with a cheating woman
  • She doesn’t meet your physical needs

Do you recognize yourself? Then it is necessary to know how to end a long term relationship when you live together. Of course, it would be painful and difficult. Still, with a set of effective recommendations at your hand, you can make the process less stressful. 

how to end a long-term relationship with someone you love

Best Guide on How to End a Long Term Relationship Peacefully

Yes, today you may feel sad and disappointed as separation has never been an easy process to go through. Even if you understand that it is the right decision, and you are sure about it, you need to apply a lot of effort to settle everything down. Keep an eye on these tips and make the recovery process simpler. 

1. Talk in person only

Some guys feel awkward starting a conversation with the lady and confessing their true feelings at the given moment. Nevertheless, you are recommended to talk in person rather than writing long letters or messages to say what you want. There is nothing worse than mention I want to end our relationship this way. You should respect your past and your future. Find the right moment to start a conversation. At this moment you should control your emotions, avoid any blaming phrases, feel confident, and protect emotional boundaries.  

2. Use the right words and avoid accusations

it is well-known that words can hurt more than actions sometimes. That’s why experts emphasize the importance of finding the right words when ending a long term relationship. Choosing a good phrase that can show your intentions clearly, may be difficult. Still, it is possible to do for sure. While being careful, you should share your point of view in a way, a lady understands you well. Forget about accusations and be thankful for the time and experience this commitment brought you. Use some apologies if necessary. Here are a few nice phrases to consider:

  • I understand how difficult it is to hear…
  • We had so many warm moments together and I will remember them always…
  • We are fighting all the time and it is enough…
  • I have been so happy with you but it is high time to move on…
  • I am so sorry to say it but I must…

It is evident that no matter how accurate your words are, they will hurt for sure. You have your story and ending it is always difficult. But choosing the right words may somehow make this conversation less painful. 

how to decide to end a long term relationship

3. Listen to your partner’s position attentively

Every partner has their own version of the truth. How to end a long term relationship with someone you love? You should be ready to listen to the lady’s side of the story. Remember that girls are more emotional than men. Guys are used to suffering from a range of emotions inside, while women do not keep them in. Therefore, you may see different reactions from the girl: cries, shouting, etc. You need to give her some space to do that. Moreover, the girl may ask you some difficult questions, so you’d better think about what you are going to answer:

  • How will I live without you?
  • How can you leave after so many years spent together
  • What did I do wrong?
  • Did you fall in love with another woman?
  • Can we try to save our relationship once again?

This way, a woman tries to remind you about the good moment you had together, and make you regret your decision. Some guys can’t bear it, and give up. This is how many stories get another chance to revive, but unfortunately, they end unsuccessfully in the long run.

4. Discuss important details with your lady

How to end a long-term relationship when you live together? You need to discuss all issues that have been common for all this time. It is crucial in case the lady was dependent on you a lot. Among such questions are:

  • Apartment (who will stay at your place and who needs to look for a new flat)
  • Loans and other financial issues
  • Taking care of children, pets, plants, etc. 

In case you have kids, things get more complicated. You need to explain everything properly without accusing each other. For your children’s sake, you have to come to a common decision on further communication. 

5. Consider support

Unfortunately, some guys do not realize how awful they will feel after the conversation.  It is a long way you should take to get to normal again. It is not a shame to say that you need assistance. There are so many great therapists who are ready to support you at this moment. If you can’t find a reliable friend or relative to share everything that you feel, then a good specialist is the right choice for sure. Step by step, you will feel better. The most important thing is to realize that men also have the right to worry, cry, have depression, etc. You definitely have this right even if a decision to end the relationship was well-thought. 

end a long term relationship

6. Go through a recovery process

Based on niche research, exactly women more often initiate ending a long term relationship. Still, it doesn’t mean that you can’t do it in case you want. Once you make a decision, you should get ready for a long recovery process. Here are a few quick tips to practice to make the process more successful within a short period of time:

  • Limit communication with your ex
  • Find a new hobby
  • Arrange a trip to places that you have been dreaming about
  • Go in for sport and take care of your body
  • Meet people who support you 

There is no definite period of time that a person needs to recover as all people are different. But you should understand that later or sooner, you will be able to back to normal, and this experience would be only a memory.

7. Open your heart when you are ready

Once your healing process is over and you feel nothing but gratitude to your ex, you can consider getting back into dating. Luckily there are so many dating options that you may try without going out. Plenty of young and beautiful ladies are dreaming about a man like you. Just look:

Yulia, 37 y.o. Ukraine, Kiev
Venus, 25 y.o. Ukraine, Nikolaev
Gorgeous T, 42 y.o. Ukraine, Berdyansk

Still, experts recommend starting a new relationship only when you truly feel like that. It is a bad idea to begin dating someone to forget your ex and find a replacement only. In this case, the result is predictable. You can’t build anything good unless you end your previous love story. 

Let’s Recap

People meet, date and not always this experience end successfully. Sometimes couples make a decision to finish the relationship. It has never been easy to go through a healing process especially if you loved each other and shared a lot. But in case your decision is well-thought and you understand that it would be better for both of you, then stop hesitating. Armed with basic but effective tips on how to end a long term relationship, your path will definitely be easier to take. Follow your heart and do everything that is better for you, without hurting your woman and wiping out all those good moments that you have had together. After all, life is going on even after separation. The most important thing is to try to cease its negative impact on both of you. 

One Comment

  1. Rob

    Ending a long-term relationship is never easy….I remember when I had to break things off with my ex, it was a tough conversation to have. I made sure to talk to her in person, rather than over text or letter. I wanted to be respectful of our past and our future….I remember saying things like “I understand how difficult this is to hear” and “We had so many warm moments together and I will always remember them.” I made sure to avoid any accusations or blaming phrases, it wasn’t her fault, it was just time for us to move on.
    I’m sorry to share so much information, I hope someone who has faced the same difficult period…is feeling better now. Life goes on

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